Ice Burns Page 15

  Chandra nodded. She knew he would let her know if anyone was coming. Warmth and a feather-soft touch in her thoughts acknowledged her belief.

  She shivered a bit, though her clothing had already begun to dry. It felt like some of the cold came from inside, and her mind drifted to icy dark eyes. Even death hadn't taken that from Master Dreys. The chill had begun before and remained as the life drained away from Master Dreys’ eyes. She could have never imagined ending someone’s life. Chandra knew her choice had never been an actual choice as much as she knew the memory would haunt her forever.

  The way her former Master had looked at her during the battle caused her whole body to shiver. Master Dreys’ eyes had told her more about the man than she had learned in her nineteen years with him. Life had not been without glimpses of his ire, but Chandra never imagined it turned on her. She had assumed he viewed her like a daughter, his apprentice, and his heir.

  Though it was strange to think that she had never known her former Master, the sadness that had grown in her began to dry out. Instead, she felt hurt stir into anger like fiery embers in the heart of flame. It was anger at the man who had been her only family. It was him who made her feel like she was more than what she was and then tore her apart when she couldn't be what he wished. Instead of a family, a parent, he had become her jailor and was ready to take anything she could give and toss her aside as though she were the wrapping to his present.

  Tears caught in the edges of her eyes like liquid fire to fuel her pain. She felt anger surge and grow inside her like a flame on dry parchment. The thought that her life had meant so little to him that she had been forced to either extinguish his or give up her own made the fire grow.

  The tiniest spark in her heart grew. Chandra no longer felt the cold of the night world around her because fire swelled inside her. The flames burned, and she determined she would never again allow someone to have control of her life. No one would ever be allowed to change her like this again.

  As she whispered a million silent vows to herself, a weight settled on her shoulders. She turned a burning gaze that guttered out when she saw Frostwhite. His eyes glowed as he looked at her from her shoulder and his feathers shone like pure silver, sparkling in the light.

  The realization that flame flickered in the hawk's eyes made her gaze snap to the fire that blazed in the hearth. She didn't remember starting it, but it glowed tempestuously from within the wood and twigs she had settled in the fireplace. Chandra felt the caress of hot air slide across her skin as it drifted out, but she was not chilled any longer. The heated part of her soul warmed from the inside out; the anger only hushed for the moment.

  Frostwhite brushed at her cheek with his beak like a kiss of temperance and she smiled. Chandra stood with the great bird’s weight like new gravity on her shoulder. She managed not to grunt but only barely.

  “We’ll need a bit more water, and I haven’t a clue what we’re going to eat. All I have is the little bit of bread I took.”

  Frostwhite murmured and launched from her shoulder. The push-off almost knocked her over. She stumbled to regain her balance.

  “A bit of warning might be nice,” she muttered.

  Frostwhite filled her mind visions and sensation. An image of the night world unlike anything humans had ever seen imprinted over her thoughts. The trees were black shadows outlined as if with white thread. Through hawk vision, the shape and movement of everything below was drawn in sharp relief. When a bit of brush shuddered with the night wanderings of a creature, the warm earthy tone of the soil became a visual experience underlined by dark soil and dry leaves. The panorama of the sky narrowed to the movement of prey and tracked it. The wind rushed past the angular body in a speedy silent decent. The rush of cold, invasive wind slid through flight feathers and across the back contour feathers as though the hawk were a blade.

  The contact was broken when Frostwhite struck his prey. Chandra jumped and yelped when the hawk dove at the small creature, thankfully missing the moment of capture and death. She shuddered and fought to hold in the bile that rose from her stomach.

  “A lot more warning actually."

  Her body stopped trying to remove what little food was in it as she drank some water to wash the acid in her throat away. She was aware of how animals hunted, but she had never seen one creature kill another. To Chandra, death was something that happened away from her bubble of existence and she was having a hard time reconciling to the change.

  Chandra gathered more water, removed the bucket from the rope and lugged it inside.

  “So, you’ve decided to seek out your destiny, have you?”

  17

  Chandra dropped the bucket on her foot and yelped. The voice came from the deep recesses of the dilapidated structure, where light from the fire did not reach. Chandra lifted her foot to rub the big toe. Her entire foot was already painful with blisters and scrapes from the day's journey and now she worried she had broken her big toe.

  “Close the door, you’re letting out the warm air,” the voice grumbled.

  Chandra opened her mouth to remark with something sarcastic about broken doors and where the hot air was actually coming from, but restrained herself. She reached down to pick up the bucket and when she stood, she saw that the door was whole and open. Chandra put her palm against it to make sure it was really there before grasping it to close the door behind her. She turned, pressed her back against it and wondered why she so willingly shut herself in with some random stranger.

  “I’ll not bite,” the voice said, and a match flared to life in the darkness, illuminating the hunched figure toward the back of the one-room building. An old woman in a long shawl lit a lamp and the back of the cottage brightened. The inside was warm and now filled with whole and comfortable furnishings. It had a lived-in look that directly opposed the exterior of the building. The room looked nothing like what she had seen before going to fill the bucket with water.

  “I was only looking for shelter for the night.”

  “If that were true, you would not have made it through the door,” the old woman said and walked toward her. Chandra breath whistled in between her teeth.

  “Don’t be alarmed; I know how I must look.”

  The woman had long, scraggly white hair over an old patched shawl and rough clothing. She was hunched and walked with a limp. She looked as though she had crawled in from the grave itself. Her skin was yellow like parchment and everything she wore was tattered and frayed at the edges despite numerous patchwork.

  The shock was her eyes, though. They were colorless. Her eyes were twin balls of pure white with no discernible iris or pupil.

  “I am a blind old woman. You have nothing to fear from me,” she told Chandra and chuckled softly as she reached the lamp out for the young woman to take.

  Petulance took her voice before maturity could silence it and Chandra muttered, "I'm not afraid of you."

  The woman said nothing as a smile drew up her sagging cheeks. Once Chandra held the lamp, the woman shuffled away and the darkness in the back of the room swallowed her. Chandra heard her moving around and saw her return with two roughly-hewn chairs. The old woman dragged them up to the fire and sat down in one before motioning to the other.

  “Have a seat.”

  Chandra sat down in the chair and found it to be more comfortable than it looked.

  “If destiny did not bring you here, what did?” the woman asked as she sipped from a mug in her hand that Chandra had never seen her get. The contents steamed and lifted the scent of mint tea to her nose. A loud squawk echoed in the darkness above them, and the woman paused with the mug at her lips.

  “The ecru?”

  “If you mean a white hawk, yes. I thought he was leading me to shelter,” Chandra said. She grumbled the last, thinking she would not have followed if she had known they would end up in the company of an old woman who didn't even offer tea as she sipped it. The woman chuckled beside her and Chandra had the uncomfortable feeling that her uns
poken words hadn't gone unheard.

  “It is a shelter of sorts. No one who wishes you harm will find you while you are here,” the woman said. She took a long drink from her mug before saying, “As far as hospitality goes, it is only given when deserved. You may make your own cup of tea.”

  Chandra narrowed her eyes at the woman, her lips drawn down, her voice silent.

  “You need to learn to not project your grumbles, child.”

  Chandra had a desire to sit and ignore the woman, but a cup of tea sounded too good to pass up. She nodded, lifting her aching body and the lantern to the back of the cottage for a cup. After a few moments of quiet searching in which she came off no closer to tea than she had before, she dropped her shoulders and looked at the old woman for a moment. She couldn't make the words come to ask for help and instead settled to sit on the floor beside the hearth.

  “How did you become a keeper of an ancient one, Chandra the Lost?”

  Though she was startled to hear her name on the woman’s lips when she had not given it, Chandra knew somehow to not feel surprised. She had a feeling that if this old woman sought any information from her, she could take it. The mage instructors seemed to have some affinity for seeing what their pupils thought, though Master had been better than most. Chandra never learned how or if she could block the intrusion. A small thought tugged at her.

  You knew not to look in Master Dreys' eyes at the end.

  She nodded to herself, but looked at the crone in the seat across from her and wondered if it was possible to make eye contact with an iris and pupil-less blind woman.

  “He found me. Why did you call him an ancient one?”

  “Hmm, I guess that is something you did not come across in your reading, then.”

  Chandra's mind flashed the image of curved script and odd spellings in a journal that had talked about the strange, wild cat. She wasn't sure she could explain it to the woman nor was she comfortable that there was too much she did not know about her friend.

  The old woman held the mug and looked into the fire for a few minutes. Chandra studied the way the light outlined the marks of time in harsh relief and wondered how old the woman really was.

  “I suppose I will have to teach you this as well," she nodded and took a sip of her tea before setting it on a plain, dark table beside her chair.

  “There has always been magic in the world, but there was a time when humans did not wield it,” she began. “The first of the mages was an anomaly. Magic and those who had it seemed to appear out of nowhere. The first ones were very powerful. Too powerful, most would say. It was a blessing for humanity that the first ones didn't understand the whole of their abilities or life might have ended.

  “You see, power seeks power, and it was not long before those first mages sought each other out. Each wanted to be considered the most powerful, and they warred. Their egos would not accept that any other might be an equal or better. It wasn't long before they destroyed each other. I would suppose that because they were all on equal standing when it came to abilities and weakness and too blind to realize it, it was the only possible conclusion.

  “In their destruction, the magic was broken and their souls were set free. The magic scattered across the various races of humankind like sand across the desert after a storm. It snuck through doorways and drifted across lands, took root in the human seed, and grew. For some, enough magic found them to give true power. For most, it was only a touch of magic that faded over time despite leaving a mark deep within them.

  “Magic found a way into humans. Some who felt the power sought others and gathered to share and explore knowledge. Others did not recognize the feeling and went on about their lives, possibly passing the gift on to another generation. No matter the case, magic lived on.

  “The souls of those great mages, though! They scattered in all directions, no longer a part of the existence they had once taken for granted, but no doubt still seeking it. Perhaps they wanted to become strong again in the presence of magic or perhaps they sought to redeem themselves by helping those who now held the gift they took for granted. No matter the case, the souls needed forms in order to continue.

  “They found it within the creatures of the planet. Just as humans sometime give birth to that which no longer lives, the animals have the same except the body lives but without the driving force behind it. Those empty shells were offered to the wandering souls to take shelter.

  “The souls took the offer, and in doing so, changed the appearance of each beast they took residence in. The ancient ones are marked by their coloring, or more often lack of coloring. Very rarely are they seen by humans. It is said they only move into the realm of man if evil is already there.”

  Heat and boneless fatigue pulled at Chandra, but she fought to listen to the end of the tale. The image of her friend made her jerk, and she found her voice.

  “You mean...” her sentence was interrupted as Frostwhite squawked and landed in her lap.

  “You were about to speak the great bird’s name?” The old woman spoke it like it was a question, but her face and smile said she did not require an answer. Chandra nodded before remembering the woman could not see her and mumbled an ascent.

  “The name given by you to the Ancient One is for you alone. To speak the name around others is to give them permission to call on the Ancient One.”

  Chandra nodded and then remembered herself and who she was nodding at.

  “I understand. Are you saying I control him?"

  The woman frowned at her and Chandra realized what the meaning of her question entailed.

  "What I mean to say..." she started again but felt as much as saw the old woman's gaze narrow.

  “It was foolish that I expected you to understand. You are spoiled and selfish and completely oblivious to anyone else’s feelings, child. Had an Ancient One not brought you to my cottage, I would ask you to now take your leave so I may rest. As it is, you may sleep on the floor near the hearth for tonight. Good night,” the woman said before shuffling away into the darkness.

  Frostwhite looked at Chandra with a studied expression that seemed critical or sympathetic. He was linked to her thoughts enough that he knew she hadn't meant to make him sound like a possession. Chandra had not given thought to her choice of words before they had left her mouth, but she did now. Though, she had to admit, she had never much cared how she sounded to someone else.

  Chandra raised her hazel eyes to the stark ones of her true friend and felt gratitude and embarrassment. The day the great bird had come into her room had been the beginning of a new life for her. She had to admit that so far it wasn’t quite what she might have hoped for. She had hope, though. She was her own person, and she had a friend.

  She reached out her hand and gently stroked the soft feathers of Frostwhite’s head.

  Chandra settled herself on the floor and tucked her bundled clothing under her head. She breathed in the wood smoke and felt the warmth of the hearth seep into her from beneath her as she drifted.

  Though she ran, Chandra heard the chittering sound behind her. It only got louder no matter how fast she tried to run and she knew that if it caught up to her, it was all over. Her hand began to surge with pain that pumped through her palm like a new pulse. She screamed and found herself facing a tall mirror but as she looked, her pupils grew until the green of her eyes and then the white of her eyes was gone. As she watched, the eyes continued to grow until she realized that they weren't her eyes but eyes on the other side of the mirror just as the mirror cracked.

  Chandra awoke to a sharp rap of wood to her head. She opened bleary eyes to look up at the old woman who stood over her dressed in a dusty gown, her white hair long and snarled, rapping her smartly with a wooden walking stick.

  “Up! I will not have you lazing about. You need to earn your keep if you wish to stay in my house.”

  Chandra grumbled and sat up. It took a few moments before what the woman had said were deciphered by her addled brain.

&
nbsp; “Stay? I’m not staying,” she said softly. She had freed herself from one Master and was not in a hurry to find a new one in the form of this wizened angry woman.

  “Is that so?” the woman said as she moved to make tea. Chandra frowned at her but paused in her reply to feel a bit of admiration for how efficiently the woman was able to work in her space despite her disadvantage.

  “Look, I left...someplace," she rubbed at the top of her head, "and I need to strike out on my own.”

  “You don’t exactly seem the outdoorsy, adventure type, child. You barely managed to stumble your way into my home. Nor do you carry any supplies with you.” The woman put several powdered herbs into the pot before lifting a bucket to pour water in. “Will you tell me where you came from?”

  Chandra paused to think of a plausible lie, but the woman stopped her before she could speak.

  “Do not bother to make a fool of yourself with some uncreative attempt at trickery.” The old woman stirred the pot. “It doesn't really matter to me. The only thing that matters is why you're here.”

  “And you know why that is?” Chandra asked, heat in her voice and disbelief in the arch of her brows.

  “I understand more than you know. Only those who need guidance can find their way to me, so you are here to learn.” She nodded her head in Chandra’s direction, and Chandra shook her head.

  “I'm not some idiot.” Chandra tried to keep the ice in her voice from putting winter creeks to shame. She admitted that she needed to figure out where she was going and how to survive long enough to make it. As long as this wasn't some sort of ploy to keep her here until the woman could bring guards to take her away, she couldn't think of a reason to leave. The aches in her body were almost reason enough to stay.

  "May I ask your name?" Chandra decided that this was the best situation she was going to get for the time being.